In one of those peculiar twists of fate, I actually met my future mother-in-law about a year, before I met my future wife. A buddy of mine introduced me to Pat and her hubby John, at a pub. We had a few drinks, got along famously, had a few more drinks, and then realised it was getting very late. My buddy and I tried to make our excuses, as we needed to arrange some sort of accommodation, but they wouldn't hear of it. "Plenty of space at our house!", they insisted. We ended up scrapping our plans, and spent the weekend with them.
Come Sunday night, we had to take the ferry back to the mainland. John and Pat accompanied us, and made us promise to stay with them, next time we were on the island. Well, my buddy found other interests, but I became a regular visitor over the coming months. One weekend, I was shocked to find that they had gone to the trouble of re-decorating an entire room just for me. It seems, I had been "adopted".
And then "She" returned. The one, who had been mentioned but rarely. I should have been smart enough to understand the implications. I wasn't.
One morning, I was sleeping off the previous night's carousing - when the bedroom-door flew open and banged against the wall.
I tried to open my eyes. "Wha?!?"
Blearily, I saw an outline in the doorway.
"What-the-fuck are you doing in my room!?", snarled Crocodile Dundee at me.
My eyes flew wide open, and I regarded the spectre before me.
Cowboy boots, worn Levis, a wide belt - with a massive buckle, chequered shirt - top three buttons undone, battered cowboy-hat, and underneath it - the angriest eyes I had ever seen, straddling the cutest nose, above the fullest lips - just begging me to kiss them.
The prodigal daughter had returned, and I was instantly - hopelessly - in love. I should have spent more time looking at her cold eyes, and less time looking at the outline of her perky, little breasts. I was to get to know those acidic looks all too well.
A year later we were married.
Six months after that, I was sitting alone on a deserted tropical beach - trying to work my way through a bottle of Southern Comfort.
It had been a stormy courtship - followed by an even stormier marriage - and I knew that I had made a terrible mistake. Two actually - if you count getting her pregnant.
So there I was - a bundle of misery - when someone sat down beside me.
It was Pat - good old Pat. She was the exact opposite of the stereotypical mother-in-law. Warm, friendly, and fun to be with. Maybe because we had been friends, long before we became relatives. She put her arm around me, and I offered her a swig from my bottle. She smiled and took a sip.
Now Pat's not really much to look at. I was 22 at the time, and she was in her early 40s. A plain face, short, mousy hair, small breasts, and a little belly. She did have a nice tan and a great ass, though.
But when she smiled - she was positively beautiful!
All through my marital troubles, she had tried to remain neutral, while still mediating. It couldn't have been easy for her. And this morning, she had snapped.
As the She-Devil and I were going at each other again, Pat whirled around, and in a voice I had never before heard from her, she snarled: "Why the fuck don't you act your bloody age, for once!"
I looked at her in shock.
The wife was even more shocked, because the outburst had been directed at her.
Things got messy after that, and lead to me and my bottle, sitting on my lonely rock, with Pat's arm around me.
Well, we drank. We talked. I told her, how miserable I was, and that I didn't know how to handle her "little girl". She told me about the problems she was having with John. Apparently he couldn't get it up anymore, and she was frustrated as hell.
Now, you might think that I saw the obvious opening, and dove right in. You'd be wrong. To me she was - first and foremost - my very good friend.
We drank some more, we sang a few songs together, and - at some point - I found myself nuzzling Pat's warm neck - listening to her purr.
She wrapped her arms around me, as I kissed her neck, nibbled her earlobe, worked my way across, and kissed first her right eyelid, then her left eyelid. With her eyes closed, I kissed her nose, and then my lips locked with those of my mother-in-law.
We kissed long - and deep. We had so much mutual frustration to exchange, it was almost painful. As our tongues fought for dominance, my hand was stroking her thigh, while hers was rubbing my pulsing bulge.
Pat was only wearing a sarong - wrapped around her and knotted above her breasts - and bikini-bottoms. We finally had to come up for air, and I took the opportunity to undo the knot. Before her sarong had dropped down to her waist, my mouth was clamped around her nipple. I sucked eagerly and swirled my tongue around, as Pat let out a low, guttural moan.
But then she stopped me.
We were both panting. My balls felt as if they were building up enough pressure to blow The Hulk into the next suburb. Pat had to swallow a few times, before she could talk.
"Are we sure, we want to do this?"
I took a deep breath. "My marriage is over - I realise this now. I am sorry, but your daughter is a selfish, immature, cold-hearted bitch. I need a real woman - someone like you!"
She smiled at that.
"But - you have your own marriage to think of. I think, the decision has to be yours. I would be delighted to be your play-mate for as long as you want - or I re-marry - god-forbid! But you must know what you want. And if you need time to think about it, that's fine too."
Well - I was lying through my teeth at that point. I thought, if we didn't finish what we started, I would probably end up trying to fuck the bottle - and get my dick stuck.
And then Pat stood up.
Aw crap! Why couldn't I just have taken her, and not tried to play Sir bleed'n Galahad!
Pat picked up the sarong - spread it out on the sand - lay down - and held her arms out to me.
Geronimo!
I tore off my clothes, as if I was on fire - which I was - dove into her arms and pierced her hot, eager mouth with my tongue again. My hand slid down her side until they reached her butt. I rolled her slightly to one side, so I could stroke her butt-cheek, with my fingers going ever deeper into her crack.
My dick was trapped between us, and slippery as hell, from the amount of pre-cum I was releasing.
As we sucked each other's tongues, her hand returned the favour, stroked my butt, and played with my anus.
Briefly, I thought of my soon-to-be-ex - who's idea of sex was once a fortnight, "If I must", on her back, not touching anything, "Aren't you finished yet - try not to get anything sticky." But then Pat's finger slipped into my ass, and my universe shrank to a tiny island of animal lust.
I - reluctantly - released Pat's tongue, which I had been eagerly violating, and licked my way down to her breasts. With Pat's finger forcing it's way ever deeper into my butt, I savaged Pat's small breasts mercilessly. I licked, until my tongue was dry, tried to suck her nipples down my throat, bit them until I thought they would bleed, and massaged her breasts, until my fingers were sore.
(My wife hated having me touch her nipples: "They're too sensitive! I guess, I was getting it out of my system.)
Through it all, Pat moaned and panted, ground her crotch against my thigh, and moved her finger in-and-out faster and faster, until she arched her back, and - with one whole breast somehow stuffed in my mouth - shrieked as she came with a massive series of shudders.
I released her breast, at the same time as her finger slipped out of my twitching ass, and rolled off her. I looked down and saw that I had leaked so much, that Pat's entire belly was glistening with pre-cum. Further down, her sarong was so wet, it looked as if she had peed herself. Gently, I slid my hand underneath her neck and pulled Pat back into my arms. She sighed and held me almost painfully tight.
"Ohmygod, I didn't realise, just how much I had needed that!"
I just smiled and kissed her bruised lips lightly. Hoping that she would see to my aching problem soon. Very soon!
She pushed me down firmly and kissed my forehead. "My daughter is a prize idiot!"
Then she looked down at my desperate situation - and laughed. "My-my - it looks as if it's about to take off and go into orbit!" With that, she lay her head on my chest and began to stroke me.
Well - it won't come as any surprise, that I lasted about twenty seconds, before erupting. Four or five times, I pumped my boiling liquid out - right into Pat's face.
"Ugh!", she laughed, without missing a beat. When I had finished, she sat on me, and lowered her cum-splattered face to mine. "Lick me clean!", she commanded. And I did. I lapped at her face, like a thirsty dog, trying to get every drop of my cum. When I finished, she lay down again and told me to relax.
She started masturbating me again, but this time it was different. The urgency had passed and she took her time, skilfully using her fingers one minute, her palm the next, teasing, edging, finding the sweet spot, giving the occasional lick for lubrication, and it wasn't long before she had me hard again.
Without further ado, Pat squatted above me, and lowered herself - cowgirl-fashion - onto my hot pole.
And that's when I discovered one of the advantages of bike-riding and swimming. Pat had legs - and thighs - made of steel. She used only her legs to raise and lower herself. Our only contact, was between our genitals. Without any other distraction, I could focus entirely on the feeling of my dick being massaged by her cunt. And it was intense!
It didn't take long, before the pressure started building again, but I was determined to hold on and wait for Pat. Sweat was pouring off her, she had an intense look of concentration on her face, her nipples looked like bullets, and she started riding me faster and faster. I clenched my teeth and tried to distract myself with mathematical equations, until I felt her thighs trembling. I was panting now, with the effort of holding it in, but then she slowed down - rose up slowly - rammed herself down so hard, I thought, my pelvis would disintegrate - and started growling like a feral animal. I couldn't hold it anymore, and shot my second load deep into her on the downstroke. Her fingers dug into my chest, like claws and she screamed as she rammed herself down one more time, and I felt her vagina spasm around my dick.
With a last moan, she collapsed on top of me, and I mournfully felt my ruined dick slip out of her magnificent pussy.
Who knows, how long we lay there - totally spent.
"Am I too heavy?"
I clasped her tighter, "I don't ever want to let you go!" I said. She giggled like a little girl. "Well - I'm certainly comfortable!" She lifted her head, and kissed me. I felt the tiniest stirring.
No - impossible - it couldn't be.
Experimentally, I caressed her sleek butt. Focussed on the feel of her nipples on my chest, her breath on my neck, and her juices running down my thigh.
There - a twitch!
Pat must have felt it underneath her leg too, for she raised an eyebrow, as she looked at me, "You've got to be kidding!" I could only look sheepish as I told her, "You're just too much woman!"
Pat snorted, "Well, my legs - and my pussy couldn't possibly go another round. So I think we'll have to save it for another day.
I wasn't really disappointed - my mother-in-law had already fucked me like no other woman ever had - or ever would again - and I was sore in a few places myself. But Pat must have been calculating, that one never knew just how long a meal might have to last. No doubt, she saw nothing but starvation ahead, once she was back in John's bed.
And so - to my surprise - she started fondling my dick again. At first play-fully, but then with determination.
But it seemed, we had both been overly optimistic. She managed to get it half-hard - but not enough to be of any use to anyone.
Little did I know, that I hadn't seen all of Pat's arsenal yet.
She'd licked my dick earlier, and had taken it into her mouth a few times - but nothing serious. Now however, she commenced to give me a proper blow-job. And she was good - maybe not the best I would ever have - but certainly the best I'd had until then. Unlike many of my partners, who did it out of duty, but weren't really into it - Pat truly seemed to enjoy sucking cock.
But there was a problem.
"I'm sorry" she said, "I can't concentrate - I need to pee." If I had hesitated, it probably wouldn't have happened - but I immediately blurted out, "I wouldn't mind a taste of that!"
Pat hesitated, and then shrugged. "I tried it once - it was like floor-cleaner. But if it turns you on....let's go over there." She pointed at a rocky patch, off to the side.
I couldn't believe my luck - it was something I'd fantasized about many times, but the one time I had mentioned it to my wife, she had just looked at me, as if I was a fungus, before walking away.
We went off to the side, and I knelt before her. Pat raised one leg onto a rock, spread her pussy-lips and aimed her groin at my eager face. I didn't want to miss one drop, so I moved closer.
Hesitantly, Pat released a small trickle. I quickly lapped it up - and loved it.
"More?" she asked.
"More!" I demanded.
Slowly she released her stream, until my mouth was directly under it - and then the floodgates opened. The stream hit the back of my throat and I had to fight a cough for a moment, but then I managed to swallow the first half mouthful - keeping my mouth open to be re-filled, before it became too much. Her bladder must have released about three cup-fulls - no wonder she was uncomfortable. I was in heaven, as I let it fill my mouth and then overflow, running down my chin. I had intended to lick her pussy clean, when she was finished, but changed my mind at the last moment.
Once I saw that she was done, I kept the last mouthful, rose quickly, grabbed her face between my hands, planted my wet lips on hers, forced them open with my tongue, and released a trickle of her own pee into her mouth.
Pat didn't pull away, but at first her eyes opened wide, before she eagerly sucked the last drop off my tongue.
"More!", she said, as she knelt before me.
Well, I wasn't sure if I could, but I needn't have worried. Maybe fifteen seconds after she knelt before me with her wide-open mouth, I started.
I had aimed at her breasts, because I didn't want to get any into her eyes, but as soon as the stream started, I worked it upwards until it was hitting her thirsty mouth. She gagged a few times, but let it fill her mouth before moving her head forward - until her mouth enveloped my still peeing dick. I couldn't believe it - Pat's tongue was working my dick, as I was peeing into her mouth, watching it run out the sides and down onto her breasts.
When I was finished, she released my dick - and we both admired my hard-on - finally ready for more action.
We hurried back to her sarong - now severely cum and sweat-stained - and she pushed me down on my back. Lifting both my legs, she told me to hold on to them, and threw herself down below me. I was puzzled for a moment, until I felt something hot and wet on my anus.
Pat was licking my butt-hole!
And so I had to add another intense experience to my list of Memories of Pat. For four or five heavenly minutes, she was first licking my anus, then inserting her tongue, and finally tongue-fucking my ass. Is it any wonder, that my dick was leaking again. Lord knows, where the liquid was coming from. I wondered if I was in any danger of dehydration.
But it had been a long afternoon, and I had trouble holding my legs up. So Pat lowered them, turned around, and unceremoniously sat on my face.
Who was I to argue. Pat's pussy smelled - and tasted - of sex. Of her juices, of my cum, of Pee, of desire. I was lapping the nectar of the gods, and could have happily drowned in it. For a long while, I concentrated on licking her cunt all over - occasionally sticking my tongue inside to retrieve more juices. But little by little, I focussed more and more on her clit. Until I stopped playing around and really went to work on it. I learnt, that she liked it best if I used medium pressure, in a steady, circular motion, just around the outside of her clit. Soon, her juices started gushing again, and my face was covered in it. She tasted so sweet, that I couldn't resist abandoning her clit every now and then, to lap up another mouthful. This "teasing" might have made her even hotter, for she came for the third time - not as intense as before - but longer, and certainly satisfying enough for me.
Finally, she tried to get off me - but I wasn't done.
"Sit up!" I commanded. As soon, as she did, I spread her cheeks, took a good long look at her delicious pucker-hole, lowered her butt until I could reach - and commenced to lick her anus. I had never done this before, but she had shown me how good it felt. I licked and I swirled, and I forced my tongue ever deeper into her hole, until she finally relaxed and there was no more resistance. I licked as deep as I could - for as long as I could, before my neck started aching too much from the strain, and then I told her to get on her knees.
Pat knew what was coming. She lowered her head onto her arms, raised her butt and waited.
I don't think, there is a more exciting sight, than a woman on her knees, exposing both her inviting holes. My overworked dick had begun to flag a little, but at the sight, it quickly rose and strained towards the Pit of Indescribable Bliss.
I scooted closer, and positioned the head, until it was right up against Pat's chocolate hole. I rubbed my head over the entrance, lubricating it as much as I could, and then - ever so slowly - pressed against the entrance.
Pat was game - she slowly pressed back against me, but she was very tight. I found out later, that she'd never had much anal play, so this was pretty new for her as well.
It took time, but I didn't mind. The sight of my dick, trying to force it's way into her tunnel was intensely erotic. But all good things must come to an end. Bit by bit, my head stretched the opening and sank a little deeper. Finally, we both held still, as the pressure finally allowed the head to slide past the ring of muscle.
For me, that is the best part of anal sex. The struggle to enter, and that first successful penetration. After that, it's not much different from intercourse, except that there is something primal about watching your dick slide in and out of someone's ass.
Pat was fingering herself, but it only served to increase her enjoyment. She didn't manage to come yet another time. I however, did - thrusting as deep into Pat's butt as I could and holding it there, as I pumped my last load into her.
Slowly - reluctantly - I pulled out, but Pat had one last surprise for me. She turned around, and took my dick into her mouth, sucking off whatever taste was on it.
"Yum", she said. "You should try it one day!"
We were both utterly spent. I thought of myself as very fit, but I was sore in places I didn't even know I had. Lord knows how Pat - who was twenty years older - felt.
We hugged and kissed for a while longer - more from the need to rest than any residual passion.
We watched the sunset silently - with our arms around each other - both lost in our own thoughts.
And then we rose and gathered our clothes. Pat had to rinse her mess of a Sarong in the sea, while I dressed.
And then we slowly headed back to her home and a very uncertain future.
Epilogue:
We both ended up divorcing our spouses. For several years, we tried to hook up again, but never managed it. Life kept getting in the way..........
