Comments Chat TOP rating Top 300

стрелкаNew stories 68833

стрелкаAnal 12637 +3

стрелкаAsian 1564

стрелкаAss to mouth 3439

стрелкаAuthoritarian 2664 +1

стрелкаBDSM 6037 +2

стрелкаBestiality 2926 +1

стрелкаBi-sexual 5364 +1

стрелкаBlack 1784 +1

стрелкаBlackmail 1860

стрелкаBlowjob 17702 +10

стрелкаBody modification 1169

стрелкаBoy 1700

стрелкаCheating 4016 +1

стрелкаCoercion 2222 +1

стрелкаConsensual Sex 14555 +8

стрелкаCuckold 1078 +1

стрелкаCum Swallowing 7629 +2

стрелкаDark Fantasy 5291 +1

стрелкаDeath 785

стрелкаDiary 2849 +4

стрелкаDiscipline 854 +1

стрелкаDomination/submission 3427 +5

стрелкаDrug 931

стрелкаErotica 3511 +3

стрелкаExhibitionism 2827 +2

стрелкаExtreme 882 +1

стрелкаFantastic 2202

стрелкаFantasy 11829 +5

стрелкаFemale Domination 1068

стрелкаFemale solo 2010

стрелкаFiction 31377 +6

стрелкаFirst Time 4745 +4

стрелкаFisting 291

стрелкаFoot or shoe fetish 241

стрелкаGay 2819 +1

стрелкаGothic 167

стрелкаGroup Sex 2448 +1

стрелкаHardcore 1861

стрелкаHumiliation 1449

стрелкаIncest 9083 +6

стрелкаInterracial 1125 +1

стрелкаJob/Place-of-work 1119 +1

стрелкаLactation 210

стрелкаLatina 180

стрелкаLesbian 3142 +2

стрелкаMale / Female 6343

стрелкаMale Domination 456 +3

стрелкаmassage 192 +1

стрелкаMasturbation 2117 +4

стрелкаMature 954

стрелкаMind Control 613

стрелкаMonster 270

стрелкаMurder 179

стрелкаNon-consensual sex 920 +1

стрелкаNon-Erotic 650

стрелкаOral Sex 3099 +1

стрелкаPoem 453

стрелкаPregnant 436

стрелкаProstitution 318 +1

стрелкаRape 1011

стрелкаReluctance 652

стрелкаRomance 2121

стрелкаSchool 781 +1

стрелкаSex Joke 689

стрелкаSlavery 240 +2

стрелкаSpanking 288

стрелкаTeen 4478 +1

стрелкаThreesome 685 +2

стрелкаTorture 148

стрелкаToys 233

стрелкаTranssexual 243

стрелкаTrue Story 11352 +3

стрелкаViolence 400

стрелкаVirginity 675 +1

стрелкаVoyeurism 578 +1

стрелкаWater Sports/Pissing 215

стрелкаWife 621

стрелкаWritten by women 814 +1


Sex games

fun ways to turn down men

Author: marianne03

Date: 20 June 2011

Sex Joke

  • Font:

Картинка к рассказу

HE: Can I buy you a drink?
SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share.

HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE: Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE: Okay, get out.

HE: I think I could make you very happy.
SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

HE: Shall we go see a movie?
SHE: I've already seen it.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Hiding from you.

HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes. and this one will be if you sit down.

HE: So, what do you do for a living?
SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not enter.

HE: Your body is like a temple.
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

HE: Where have you been all my life?
SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life - in your wildest dreams.


91794   1 1673   Rating +7.43 [793]

Add to favorites
  • Complain about a story

    * Mandatory field
Comments 47
Sign Up and leave comment

Last stories by marianne03

arrowChat +1