If you think I didn't consider the fact this was a porn site before I wrote this, you have to go back to school, college, night-classes god! do something!
If you can't figure out what this poem is trying to convey, I feel sorry for you. Maybe you should pick up an anthology of work by Walt Whitman, then you would actually see some relevance in how people express sexuality a little more metaphorically. Or maybe not, it may infact be too "deep" for you "duuuude," "maaaan," whatever people refer to you as.
The content of this poem should exceed certain expectations of what people see as porn-lit, or erotic texts if anything. It deals with a subject in sex you probably wouldn't understand because you're obviously stubborn about interpreting and reading actual literature.
If the Marquis DeSaade were alive today he would beat you senseless and then have his way with you.
--Ubiquitous
P.S. maybe you should refrain from using insipid internet abbreviations like "WTF" as a new start for yourself. "WTF"? ....wow , how profound of you ! I've never seen that before!!! I have to sit down, it's just too insightful for me to handle! (sarcasm)
Wow ! you actually managed to use the word aberration !
Phew! that just blew me away...let me tell you (By the way, this is sarcasm...just pointing that out for you again)
Listen, I feel sorry for you, no seriously... I do, because It's so hard for some people to accept the fact that they actually are homosexual. You don't have to be afraid anymore though ! you see, there's nothing wrong with being gay, but really, don't suppress your true feelings and take them out on me ok ???
You obviously are a little insecure about your situation as a possible homosexual. You need to concentrate on either accepting the fact that you are, or stop reacting so viciously because you're obviously insecure about your sexuality. Psychological science has proven reactions like yours to be a finite sign of suppressed homosexuality.
Although I don't disagree with homosexuality, I must say you should really re-think what you've said up until this point, because you've shown more promise for yourself in this category based on the content of your own accusations.
Oh, and if you were implying that I was comparing Whitman Or Thoreau to my work, you're funnier than I thought...you, me, and everyone else cannot compare to them...that remark is what's really insipid other than the fact you've probably never even read anything by them. Oh, the whole... "you suck!" comment? are you in 5th grade? Does it occur to you that the only thing you're bothering me with is moronic, ill-thought statements. (which are pretty meaningless anyhow.) Babble you say? don't make me laugh.. I could frame your comments around the walls of a gallery.
And you call me sick ??? I wouldn't be surprised if you wind up in jail on a domestic violence charge someday because you beat-up your wife. If I were you, I'd call up a psychiatrist before leaving the house today.
-Ubiquitous
P.S. please don't go out of your way to entertain me any further... It's not mandatory.
Okay, not the same person as the other 'Reader's. Now, while I admire you attempt to use poetry besides the basic 'cock' and 'rock' example you gave on a site like this, this is not the right audience. There are sites out there dedicated to erotic poetry. This is just an off-shoot of a porn site. Sorry. Also, I did not personally find the poetry itself that great. While I got the methaphors (not so simple as you say though, keep in mind you're the poet so you see them right off), it just wasn't that good. Try again next time, but find a different outlet.
First off, I apologize... it's hard to wade through many of the people here who have chosen "reader" as their user-name. It naturally occurred to me that you were the same person, based off that.
Honestly though, I appreciate the honest criticism, but I don't think what you've said about my poem is all that relevant. I understand that this is an offshoot of a porn-site ( I Took that into account even before writing) but there isn't any substance behind most of the entries on this off-shoot site.
To let nearly functionless words on here increase as they have, and have nothing of considerable academic merit continue to manifest and multiply herein would be like letting an unavoidable dilemma get worse over time.
I can't speak for everyone, but if most people were to do whatever they pleased under appointed context, poetry wouldn't even exist. However, I'm not going to bore you with the ambiguity of maintaining proper balance in the world, but it seems here that sites like these do need something more than the 'cock" and 'rock' examples. Despite the obvious, people are going to comment harshly on anything I post, but to let the select idiots be idiots so to speak, would be ill-thought of, and has shown no promise in everything we do.
As far as my poem goes, you said that my metaphors were not that simple, but yet you say that you got the metaphors anyhow. Poetry is not meant to be looked-at at such a face value, it needs to be read, you need to find reference in it. You can't just get the gist of it and expect to be satisfied. Poetry is not always so start-to-finish like prose is, you have to interpret casual elegance in word-choice and sentence structure. Poetry is not meant to be gratuitous and amiable storytelling.
As far as your critique is concerned, there wasn't any facts, factoids, or insolvencies to assert about why you disliked the poem as-is. Honestly, I think the fact that you didn't point them out to me first-hand makes present and future criticism immobile now.
For the most part, my poems are submitted to other outlets, forums, etc. and I have had work published,
so I don't see your criticisms as relevant to my case on here.
Once again, I apologize for you being caught in a cross-fire of sorts, but I simply cannot agree with what you've said up until this point.
Ho! Ho! whoa now ! just whoa! hold on, let me just put out the fire you just started with that comment Wow! ...out of all the profound remarks I've heard on here that one has to be the best ! I must tell you, I have to commend you on such a well-thought-of remark.
I should have obtained a grand-prize for this moment...phew you just really caught me off guard with that one !
Do you compose wonderful operas in your spare time ?
I think you do...that was unmitigated genius dear sir !
I think the totality of humanity can absolve all their problems on the potential you have displayed to me today my friend.
I would consider you an immeasurable aid to society at large but I'd have to test you on your understanding of honest sarcasm, because that's what this is.
Maybe it's better you're sleeping, you might invoke nothing but lukewarm feelings in others if you get out of bed in the near future.
