Maeghan Wrist
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I squinted my eyes to look at the doorway and met my mom staring directly at Ean. Turning my head, I found Ean oblivious to what was happening as I could still feel warm streaks of liquid climb up my insides. For all the stupidity in me, all I could think of was to yell out.
“Elephant!” I almost screamed. Both mom and Ean snapped out of their trances and locked their eyes to me. Then it didn’t take two seconds for Ean to catch someone else with us in the corner of his eye and his body ripped off of mine flinging a parabolic strand of cum in the air between his penis and my vagina.
“Mom,” I called out again not realizing how childish and hurt I sounded. I was in tears and said her name in surprise that she was home. She immediately rushed over to me and took me in her arms.
I couldn’t see Ean but I imagined that he was scared to near death. Squeezing me super tightly, she dragged me away from my brother.
“Get out of this house now,” she said in an incredibly scary voice towards him.
“No,” I yelled into her chest. “I told him to do it. I made him do it to me. I made him from the start.”
“You be quiet. You don’t need to defend him. You’re only fourteen.”
“No,” I almost screamed as I pushed with all my capacity. She gave way as if in shock. “I started it all. I begged him because I didn’t have any friends and he just lost his girlfriend. I wanted to have sex with him before he even came home. I did everything in my power to use his depression so he would use me as comfort and have sex with me. Being a fourteen year old girl doesn’t make me stupid, it only makes me more persuasive.” Surprisingly, mom let out a single laugh.
“Why are you crying then?” she asked.
“Because,” I said defensively. “I wasn’t on birth control so I stopped having sex for two whole weeks with him but I couldn’t stand it anymore. I begged him to rape me so I would feel less like I failed.” I ended in a soft voice. “Our safe word was elephant.”
In the most weird turn in the entire situation, mom smiled as if she was trying to hold back laughter. Then she suddenly became serious again.
“And what about that last thing you said?”
I had to think back to what she meant and then remembered splurging out my deepest fear while Ean was in mid orgasm.
“What last thing,” Ean asked coyly not sure whether he was allowed to speak. Mom looked at him, then to me.
“We’ll talk about that in private,” she consoled. Looking from my tear drying, embarrassed face to Ean’s probably scared shitless one, mom smiled again. “I used to have an older brother too you know. Although he wasn’t five years older,” she eyed at Ean. “But I’ve had some time to think about it.”
I glared at my mom.
“You can’t expect me to not suspect something when I find my daughter’s clothes in a line leading to her brother’s bed the morning I come home from a business trip. Then to see my little depressed Ean all of a sudden happy and kicking. Not to mention on that exact same day, my daughter asks me to put her on birth control.” I smiled at how naive I was while listening to her.
“What?!” Ean shouted. That put a cringe on my face. “You asked her then to just start you on it!?” At that, my mom’s face contorted like she just got in trouble. “You threw away my condom; you said you were on the pill, you told me to trust you!”
I stared intently down to the edge of his mattress completely ashamed. I did tell him to trust me. Trust was the ultimate thing with us and I betrayed that. The more his words sank into my mind, the closer I got to tears.
“Everything is ok,” mom started in. “Maeghan and I will go to the store right now and get the morning after pill. She’ll start her birth control tomorrow and before you two do anything more, I’m going to have a proper talk to both of you about this. Now get some clothes on.”
Mom stood up and left the room waving me to follow. I crawled from the bed and walked a few steps behind her. My body was shaking in fear and embarrassment as my vagina moaned in soreness. Uncomfortably, as my mom turned around at the exit to lead me out, I had to press my hand between my legs to keep the leaking cum from dripping onto the carpet.
Walking from his doorway, I moved the two feet down to my own and turned into my room. I quickly put my clothes on thinking about that morning after pill mom mentioned. It had to be something to stop a baby.
Throwing a pair of socks on and scooting into my shoes, I walked out to my mom where we headed to her car. It felt weird walking outside in the dark with my mom moments after having sex with my brother. Quickly I got in the car and buckled up.
“Why are you home so early?” I asked just wanting to break the awkward silence.
“What’do you mean, it’s two-thirty.”
“You meant in the morning?” I asked in disbelief. “Shouldn’t you have made a point to tell us that?”
“What, and miss the surprises on your faces when I popped in,” she smiled. A short silence followed.
“Mom… are you really okay with me and Ean. It really was all me and I really don’t want to stop. He’s the only guy I’ll get for at least until I go to college.”
“Don’t talk like that. Your body is yours and you should accept nothing less than the absolute best. Don’t just give it to any guy that shows an interest in you.”
“I know that mom. I spent fourteen years with Ean before I let him have me.”
“And you best wait fourteen years with any boyfriend before he’s proved himself worthy of you.”
“If I did that,” I said lightheartedly, “then I don’t think you’d ever get grandchildren from me.” That was followed by an incredibly uncomfortable silence before she spoke again.
“When was your last period?”
“Same time as the last time you asked,” I said softly with discomfort.
“What’s that mean?”
“It’s the same one. Five weeks ago.” I gulped harshly.
“I guess we’ll be getting a pregnancy test too.”
All I could do was stare at the dashboard as it bubbled and waved through the gathering liquid in my eyes. We pulled into a twenty-four hour convenience store. The overly loud noise of me sucking the mucus back up my nostrils filled the silent car as the engine died. Mom put her hand on my shoulder.
“I’m scared,” I cried through a bubble in my throat. My mom unbuckled herself and me before pulling me into her chest. “I told him to trust me,” I coughed into her shirt. “I lied to him so many times just for myself and now this. He’s never going to forgive me. He’ll run away to college and never come back.”
“Shhhh, shhhhh, let’s not jump to conclusions,” mom said softly.
“You probably hate me now and school will be terrible. I’ll lose my only friend too when her parents find out.”
“Shhhh, I’ll never hate you. No matter what happens, you can always count on me.”
“I need Ean,” I popped through another bubble. “I can’t live without him. I’ll never have sex with him again to make this all go away. I promise. I promise. I promise everything in my life.”
Mom didn’t say anything more. She just hugged me into her chest harder and harder. All I could do in return was cry; cry like a child. Deep, loud sobs as I soaked her shirt with my tears, watery snot, and drool.
Ten, twenty, possibly thirty minutes passed where I simply couldn’t stop venting. All I remember was being set back into my seat after nearly dozing off in tears.
“I’ll be right back honey.” The car door was gently shut seconds later.
I could only imagine what the store clerk thought seeing my mom buying a morning after pill and a pregnancy test with the soaked impression of some young girl’s face in her bosom. I knew my mom could care less though what anyone else thought. She only ever cared about Ean and I.
She returned with a small grocery bag and tossed it in the back seat.
“I’m starving, you want to get something to eat?” she asked. I was a little hungry. I just grunted a soft okay.
Traveling off to some fast food drive-thru, we parked and ate together in the car. Mom started talking about the highlights of her trip to Washington D.C. and all the places she visited in her free time. My mind quickly took in the cheap yet classic taste of the food while I forged my mom’s experiences to the pictures and videos I’d always seen of there.
I was never much into the news so she left out anything about the trial she covered. I rarely read her articles in the newspaper as they were always boring adult stuff. She had said once that one day I’d come to respect that boring adult stuff and I just replied that I one day, I’d write my own interesting adult stuff to show people what real life actually was.
We talked long after we finished our meal and finally headed home by nearly four in the morning. Pulling into the driveway, I reached back and grabbed the little bag into my hand.
“Can we try it tonight,” I asked coyly. “I’d rather sleep on the results than have a whole day to think about them.”
Mom smiled and nodded. My facial expression mimicked hers uneasily and we both retreated from the car and headed into the house. We walked to the back of the house, checked on Ean who was asleep, and headed into the bathroom. It was a simple pee test but because of that, I had to ask my mom an inevitable question.
“Um, I’m kind of full right now. Uh, will Ean’s stuff inside me throw off the test?” She smirked back.
“I doubt that, but still, if you can, try just to get your pee on it and not his ‘stuff’.”
She handed me the test stick and left the room, quietly closing the door. Pulling my pants and underwear down, I sat on the toilet and waited a few seconds. Finally, I held my shaking hand with the test next to my vagina and started to pee.
I watched a little bit of Ean’s cum splash out with the spearhead of my urine and after that, I quickly put the testing stick down into my stream. I held it there for the entire length of my peeing. More cum oozed out of me but stayed clear of my projecting stream. I finished up, setting the test on the counter, and wiped myself clean. Pulling my pants and underwear up, I headed to open the door with a quivering hand.
As soon as my mom was in my sight, I fell into her body and gripped her tightly. She squeezed me back with equal comfort and strength. For two minutes we hugged silently before I felt myself being guided back into the bathroom.
We were back at the counter where I laid the test.
“Maeghan. It’s done.”
I didn’t want to look. I knew what it had to say. Over a week after my suppose to be period. Three weeks of a baby growing inside of me since my last sex. Why else did I not have my period yet?
It took a willpower I didn’t know I had to actually want to confirm what my mind was screaming at me for. It felt as if I was spraining my neck to turn from my mom’s chest and look down at the counter. And then, there it was. The final answer.
I immediately turned back into her breast and squeezed my face as hard as I could into her. As loud as I could, I screamed for all my lungs were worth. Tears were streaming from my eyes. I was pregnant. I was pregnant. I was pregnant. I was fourteen. I was pregnant. I screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed. I couldn’t deny it anymore. I just wanted to die. I was pregnant.
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e.l. hanes
